Anger can be positive and negative, depending on how it is managed.

Despite common belief, anger can be positive and negative in that: if constructive, it can prod one into positive action; if destructive, it can seriously affect one’s ability to cope, much less succeed.

By Trudy-Ann Ewan (edited by Christine Blythe)

Anger can be positive and negative, depending on how it is managed.

Anger can be positive and negative, depending on how it is managed.

Constant bullying and abuse of any kind will make you angry. I do not like to see anyone ridiculed, bullied or put down, regardless of the reason. I do not like injustices, and perceiving injustices causes me to feel righteous anger.

Righteous anger is the anger that propels me to want to understand and speak for other human beings who are being abused, who are being taken advantage of. This blog is the result of that anger and I truly hope it is of some help to other victims.

That does not mean that anger is controlling me.

There is healthy and righteous anger and then there is damaging anger. The damaging anger is the anger that people use to bully, abuse and commit acts of violence towards other human beings.

We are all human beings and the same way that we can feel happiness, love and joy, we can also feel anger. When we bury anger we are also burying pain, love, happiness and joy. We can’t block one emotion and then still expect to feel the others. Thinking that we should control our anger will only cause that anger to be turned inward, causing negative effects on our physical and mental health. By expelling all those toxic thoughts and feelings, I am better able to feel more positive emotions and not focus so much on the negative.

That does not mean that I’m never going to get angry.

For years I had buried all the anger I wasn’t supposed to express. I was supposed to be this prim and proper young lady who had to comport myself in a very upstanding manner. No matter what others did to me I was never to get angry. Even after being physically and sexually abused I was still to remain a good girl, always in control and to never voice what I was feeling. Needless to say, all of the anger and pain turned to a life-long simmering rage within me.

I kept on burying my pain. It caused me to suffer from skin breakouts, acute migraines, severe back pains, severe sinusitis, insecurity, feelings of deep inferiority, acute bronchial asthma, deep self-loathing, low self-esteem, low self-worth, anxiety, chronic depression, and the list goes on. And of course the same people who were abusing me would be the same ones to turn around and tell me that I have no right to be angry or that I’m too sensitive.

Anger has become a healing tool for me. It has awakened me to not tolerate others abusing me the same way I won’t tolerate others being abused. I learned that I was just as important and no less value than they were. By feeling, acknowledging and expressing my anger, I was able to finally feel love, joy and happiness. Anger has helped me to heal, thus giving me inner strength.

My life is worth more than the sum of all my past treatment and bullying. I am deserving of a life, and a passionate one at that. I continue to struggle with the effects of past abuses and bullying, manifested in severe chronic depression, anxiety, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), agoraphobia and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

Although I have become numbed and distanced from the outside world, I value and love my home world, my family and pets all the more for it.

About the Author: Trudy-Ann Ewan (edited by Christine Blythe)
 
Expert Author Trudy-Ann EwanTrudy-Ann Ewan is a Keynote Speaker, Author and Spiritual Wholistic Life Guide, who specializes in working with Women, who are ready to embark on their Journey to building a balanced, wholistic and healthy relationship with themselves in order to create and live a passionate, powerful life so they can create the life they desire. To read more from Trudy-Ann, feel free to visit her website. 
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photo credit: reinekaos via photopin cc

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